is it okay to be friends with benefits with an ex

Title: Navigating the Territory of Friends with Benefits with an Ex


When it comes to relationships, things can sometimes get complicated, especially after a breakup. Many people wonder if it’s okay to maintain a “friends with benefits” relationship with an ex. While the answer to this question can vary depending on individual circumstances, it’s essential to consider the potential consequences and emotions involved before embarking on such an arrangement. In this article, we explore the pros and cons and offer some insights into this controversial topic.

1. Pros of Being Friends with Benefits with an Ex:

a. Familiarity and Comfort: Being friends with benefits with an ex allows you to maintain a sense of familiarity and comfort. Since you’ve been intimate with this person before, there is already a built-in level of trust and connection.

b. Convenience: You may already have established routines, shared hobbies, and mutual friends, making it convenient to maintain a physical relationship without the commitment. This convenience can be particularly appealing to those who are not seeking emotional attachments at the moment.

c. Exploring Sexual Compatibility: If the reason for the breakup was unrelated to sexual compatibility, being friends with benefits can give you an opportunity to explore this aspect further. This can be a chance to enjoy the physical connection without the obligations that come with a romantic relationship.

2. Cons of Being Friends with Benefits with an Ex:

a. Emotional Attachment: One of the significant risks of being friends with benefits with an ex is the potential for rekindling emotions. Physical intimacy can awaken feelings that may complicate the arrangement and potentially lead to heartache if one party desires a romantic reconciliation while the other does not.

b. Jealousy and Possessiveness: Even in a friends with benefits scenario, jealousy and possessiveness can arise, especially if one or both parties begin seeing other people. This can create tension and strained feelings, and may ultimately damage the friendship.

c. Difficulty in Moving On: Being involved in a friends with benefits relationship with an ex can hinder the process of moving on. It may prolong the healing period, preventing both individuals from fully letting go and finding new romantic connections.

3. Considerations and Communication:

a. Honesty is Key: Setting clear expectations and boundaries with your ex-turned-friend is crucial. Open and honest communication is essential to ensure both parties are on the same page and comfortable with the arrangement.

b. Reflect on Past Patterns: Consider the reasons for the breakup and analyze whether those issues can be problematic when entering into a friends with benefits situation. If the same challenges persist, it may be wise to take a step back and prioritize personal growth and healing.

c. Regular Check-ins: It’s essential to continuously assess your emotions and comfort levels throughout the arrangement. Regular check-ins with yourself and your partner will help identify any changing dynamics or unmet needs.


Deciding whether it is okay to be friends with benefits with an ex is a personal choice that depends on various factors. It is crucial to assess your emotional readiness, communication skills, and the potential impact on both yourself and your ex-partner. While it may be tempting to rekindle physical intimacy with an ex, it is essential to prioritize your emotional well-being and make choices that align with your long-term happiness. provides a platform where individuals can explore new connections and potential relationships in a safe and respectful manner. Sign up today and embark on your journey to find meaningful connections!